Someone's Getting Pregnant This Weekend

The booze is a-callin'. If you are undecided on which way to turn this weekend, look no further, I'm here for you. Everything I am recommending will involve a cocktail (a necessity, let's be honest) and/or delicious food. What else could you possibly need to wind down on the weekend? Well, of course, there are a ton of other things we wish we could drown in. Personally, I have a tub filled with Plan B contraceptive, tequila and M&M's. If you see me at one of these spots, buy me a beer, I'm thirsty.

Haddington's is a great place to start for dinner, their menu makes my stomach growl. I've been there for happy hour, cocktail hour and every hour. Haddington's offers something I am dying to try, perhaps for a group dinner with some good ole' friends:  A whole animal roast! You may call and reserve a space for the Chef to prepare a five course meal of an entire pig, lamb or goat (prices vary).  This is a must try at Haddington's. They also have a great drink menu if you just want to pop in for a cocktail. Also, the valet guy is a doll, tip him generously. 



Courtesy of Eater Austin

Bar Illegal. Is there a more fitting place for a drunk Mexicana to unwind? Bar Illegal is the new installment on Rainey Street (it sits in Clive Bar's backyard) and will only serve handcrafted, small-batched Illegal Mezcal. Holy fuck! I foresee some drunk Spanglish ramblings in my future. The cozy 20 seat bar is said to give off the feeling of a traditional Mexican cantina. This might be true, but I remember when I was 18 going to Matamoros and getting sloppy in a Mexican cantina at a $12 all-you-can-drink hole in the wall. I have no recollection of what the place looked like, I vomited all night and had to be carried across the border. Guess I need to make sure I'm with a strapping young man just in case I need to be carried across Cesar Chavez.

Where else are you going to end up? The Yellow Jacket Social Club is one of my favorites. I know I have mentioned them before, but this really is a diamond on East 5th St. Their patio is badass, the bartenders are sweet as pie, and most importantly, they serve food until 1:30 am! Now, this isn't the usual boring, fried bar food, their shit is pretty good. You know I can't get enough meat, order the Charcuterie plate and a pint and you're set. They also have a delicious piloncillo cheese (Yellow Jacket Social Cheese), I am a fan of most anything mixed with piloncillo. Yes, please.

Please don't get pregnant this weekend, that sounds really expensive either way you handle it. If anyone out there is in to the whole animal roast, get at me, I want in! Oh, and watch your Mezcal intake if you're a Gringo, that shit will kill you. 

Happy Friday!