Don't you just love when you meet a family member for the first time you never knew existed? Is this just Mexican specific? Ok, it probably is, we have a dickton of relatives scattered about. I know you all know about my charming Uncle Tio and his thoughtful ways, well this past weekend I had the pleasure of meeting a new cousin - thrice removed on my father's side - named, and I am not joking, Petho Mahon. This, unfortunately, is not his given name, his real name is Raul Martinez, some neighborhood kids gave him the nickname. Petho is now 90 years old. Apparently, the tale goes Petho used to wash his dishes in the bathtub with him every night. He would just sit and multitask with his washcloth. Don't act like you haven't done shit like this before. It's kind of like brushing your teeth and combing your hair at the same time. Petho was a little odd, aren't we all? Because of this, the neighborhood kids came up with this juvenile name, Petho Mahon, to tease him which literally means fart shit. It makes no sense, I know. It's Spanish slang, so don't go using this in real time situations when referring to the after effects of the Tamale House.
Legend has it Petho would sit outside on his porch every night before bathing/doing dishes, eating his mango, drinking a Bud while the neighborhood kids would cruise by on their bikes making fart noises, screaming "Petho Mahon, Petho Mahon" obnoxiously over and over like kids do. My father said Petho was such a sweet man, he would just wave his little mango hand to the little shits causing a stir in the streets, never getting upset. When I met Petho this weekend I told my father we had to bring him to Austin so I could complete the Holy Trinity - Me, Uncle Tio, and Petho Mahon. The three of us are going to drink this town dry, all under $5. Here we are:
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| Miss Motherfuckin' Austin |
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| Petho Mahon |
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| Uncle Tio |
Look for us this weekend on Rainey Street, and in November at Fun Fun Fun Fest.
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