Do's and Don'ts of flops

Being in Texas it gets real fucking hot, I get it. We are approaching the time when minimal clothes are necessary to survive. Flip flops are a tricky thing. Usually, women and gay men get a pass because they all take care of their feet. You know, buffing the dry skin off, trimming the nail, and shaving/waxing any unsightly hair, etc. Now, I have seen some dinosaur feet on women (as seen below) and dudes with yellow toe nails (gag reflex). I beg of you Austin, please just look down at your dogs and ask yourself, "Would a hunk or babe suck on these?" If the answer is no, please, please put on them sneakers. Thanks.

Do. Not bad, he thought about it and he looks like he's ready for the pool. I like.

Don't. Woof. This is a woman. Her flop doesn't even want to be associated with that stump.

DON'T.  Giggles. I can't take it.  

Do. Girly and appropriate.

 Don't. She would've gotten a pass because she's old, but her old feet were so dry and cracked I almost spit my coffee on her.

Don't. I can't get beyond the dirty breakfast time ass crack. I couldn't get a good look at either one of their feet.