Stop staring at me and do something

I know some dudes are shy and are afraid of rejection but you need to get over it. What's wrong with getting rejected, anyway? Hey Fabio, do you really think every girl is into you? No, of course not. Once you acknowledge you won't get every cute little thing out there and you might get rejected, you'll reel in the chicks, trust me. I put my shit out there. If I'm into you, you'll know it. For me, I'd rather have all the information on the table. Why would you wander around a bar or a party thinking "She's hot" or "She seems like a cool chick, I want to make out with her," but not put yourself out there? It's fun and actually kind of liberating to be overtly honest and unafraid of being rejected. Sure, it might hurt your ego a little but who gives a fuck? You'll get over it. And, now you have a better chance of getting laid and less chance of getting a virus on your computer from all the sketchy porn you're going home to watch, alone.

Last night I was out with one of my favorite gals and I noticed a couple of dudes walk by and just stare. I think I am easily approachable. I can gab with anyone. Do something. Don't just keep walking by and not at least say hello. After a few drinks, I tend to get a little funny and my contacts start to get hazy. This works in your favor, dudes. This is the perfect opportunity to approach women. Do something. (Note: definitely approach me after a couple shots of tequila. I might have your babies and give you my PIN number).

Maybe I am alone here, hopefully not. Well, have no fear Austin because I am on a mission to get all you singles laid, or at the very least a morsel of hope you can see a shiny new vagina or a piece of Grade A grass fed man meat.

I'm on it, Austin.